What a fucking waste of an outfit
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
The adults are the big ones right?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
