I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize