i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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