let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize