remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
