he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
