Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
