Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
