i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
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Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
did you just send me my own nude
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
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