Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize