some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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