Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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