so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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