Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Randomize
