I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Randomize
