I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
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