i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
