i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
