hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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