Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
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