i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
