Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
we should paint friendship bongs
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