Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
