I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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