Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
