she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Randomize