talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
