Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
