the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
