Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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