Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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