He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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