oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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