you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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