Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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