He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
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It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
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I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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