no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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