oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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