You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Randomize
