I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
