I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
