I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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