a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
sarcasm needs its own font
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
