im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
How's work?
Spinning.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
