my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
