I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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