Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Randomize
