do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
