Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
