Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize