at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
